I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
