What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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