We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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