I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
