what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
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