Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
