it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
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