what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize