my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
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