First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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