stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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