So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
