that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
