NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
