Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
