it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
