Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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