what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
