he wants to bone in the snuggie
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
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