im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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