you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
