I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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