so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
