talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
