can u get pink eye on your cock?
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Randomize
