She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
