Banned from zoo.
Again?
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
