can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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