"it" just moved
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
They have beer where we have blood.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
