She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
mondays should just be called national damage control day
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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