your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
