Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
