can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Randomize
