so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
