I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
COCAINE IS GR8
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