ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Randomize
