i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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