How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize