Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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