Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
