Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize