I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
The best revenge is premature balding
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
