Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
My dick has a subreddit
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
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