porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
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