Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize