have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Randomize
