It's like God shit irony all over that family
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
