I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
found the other keg... it's in the tree
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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