i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
