the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
