he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
