Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
